LIST OF RELATIONSHIP MANLAWS

[friskycutter]

Just to make the world an easier place to live in

 

 

 

 

 

 

1) Men are NOT mind readers, just tell us what you want. Lets be clear, subtle hints do not work, strong hints do not work, obvious hints do not work. Just say it!!

 

2) Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up put it down. We need it up, you need it down. you dont hear us complaining

 

3) Sunday sports. Its like the moon or the tides, let it be.

 

4) Shopping is NOT a sport, you wont convince us.

 

5) Crying is blackmail, stop!

 

6) Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to every question.

 

7) Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. Thats what we are for. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

 

8) A 17 month headache is a problem, see a doctor.

 

9) Anything we said over 6 months ago is inadmissable in an argument. If what we said was more than 10 sentences it is null and void after 7 days.

 

10) If you wont dress like a Victoria's Secret girl dont expect us to act like soap opera guys.

 

11) If you think you are fat you probably are, dont ask us.

 

12)If something can be interpreted 2 ways and one makes you mad, we meant the other one.

 

13)You can ask us to do something but NOT tell us how to do it. If you know how to do it best, you do it.

 

14)Whenever possible, say what you have to say during the commercials.

 

15) All men see in only 16 colors, like Windows defualt settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit. We have no idea what Mauve is.

 

16) If it itches we scratch it, its best that way.

 

17) If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothing is wrong. We know youre lying, but its not worth the hassle and you will bring it up later anyway.

 

18) If you ask a question you dont want an answer to, expect an answer you dont want to hear.

 

19)When we have to go somewhere, anything you wear is fine....... really.

 

20) Dont ask us what we are thinking about unless you want to discuss Hockey, Motorcycles, Beer, or Boobs.

 

21) You have enough clothes.

 

22) You have too many shoes.

 

23) I am in shape, its called round.

 

24) Thanks to all the women that read this and yes we know we have to sleep on the couch but men dont really mind that, its like camping.