Why did the Chicken Cross the Road!!!!

[Richard Z]

DR PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on THIS side of the road before it goes after the problem on the OTHER SIDE of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his CURRENT problems before adding NEW problems.

 

 

 

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

 

 

 

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

 

 

 

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

 

 

 

ANDERSON COOPER - CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

 

 

 

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

 

 

 

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

 

 

 

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

 

 

 

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

 

 

 

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

 

 

 

 

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain. Alone.

 

 

 

 

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

 

 

 

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.

 

 

 

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

 

 

 

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

 

 

 

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2010, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never [reboot]

 

 

 

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

 

 

 

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of "cross the road"?

 

 

 

AL GORE: I invented the chicken!

 

 

 

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

 

 

 

@#$$#! CHENEY: Where's my gun?

 

 

 

 

Bring On the Ban Hammer!!!

Richard Z.

[dlaing]

Bring On the Ban Hammer!!!

That was too balanced to inspire the Ban Hammer.

But just to be sure, we should make it more balanced...

George Dubya Bush's quote should have read,

"The chicken did not cross the road to evade torture by the army intelligence, we don't do that in a'Merica, it crossed the road because on this side we are free, and chickens hate freedom"

Or "because the chicken is a homicidal dictator who is addicted to weapons of mass destruction."

[Martin Barrett]

Right political etc reason for the chicken to cross the road

 

to escape sexual persecution as a minority

 

or as a sacrifice to deities

 

We should be concerned at the number of chickens that meet needless deaths in their flight(?) from tyranny.

should we do more?

 

 

 

Bob this is and ideal opportunity for you to get your cock out <_>

 

 

Some one should get a grip of this before it goes too far, who'se responsible for this forum

[badmotogoozer]

 

Some one should get a grip of this

 

Chicken choker!

 

Rj