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Posted

Spam spam spam spam, spam spam spam spam SPAMMITY SPAAAAM SPAMMITTY SPAAAAAAM.

 

 

What's the spam surprise?

 

That's sausage,bacon,spam,eggs,spam,tomatoes,spam and spam without the sausage bacon eggs and tomatoes.

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Guest 2wheelin2dn
Posted

S #1: Where'd you get the coconuts?

A : We found them.

S #1: Found them? In Mercia? The coconut's tropical!

A : What do you mean?

S #1: Well, this is a temperate zone.

A : The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land?

S #1: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?

A : Not at all. They could be carried.

S #1: What? A swallow carrying a coconut?

A: It could grip it by the husk!

S #1: It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut.

A: Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here.

S #1: Listen. In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second, right?

A: Please!

S #1: Am I right?

A: I'm not interested!

S #2: It could be carried by an African swallow!

S #1: Oh, yeah, an African swallow maybe, but not a European swallow. That's my point.

S #2: Oh, yeah, I agree with that.

A: Will you ask your master if he wants to join my court at Camelot?!

S #1: But then of course a-- African swallows are non-migratory.

S #2: Oh, yeah...

S #1: So they couldn't bring a coconut back anyway...

 

:thumbsup:

Posted

Our ththththrree chief weapons are surprise, fear, ruthless efficiency...

 

...and a fanatical devotion to the pope!

Posted

Aahhhh..Amongst our weaponry........

 

Are such diverse elements as.......

 

surprise, fear, ruth...

 

 

 

 

I'll come in again! :blush:

 

 

CARDINAL BIGGLES!

Posted

So,

You want to learn to defend yourself against someone armed with a pointed stick, Eh?

 

Try that with a pineapple down your windpipe.......

 

 

Simply pull the lever, and the 16-ton wieght will fall on top of him.

Posted

My favorite, but since it was already taken........

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.

Rj

63111[/snapback]

 

Sir Bedevere: What makes you think she's a witch?

Peasant : Well, she turned me into a newt.

Sir Bedevere: A newt?

Peasant : ...I got better.

Crowd: [shouts] Burn her anyway!

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